Richard Baum

Liberal Democrat Councillor for the St Mary’s ward of Bury MBC, and Prospective Parliamentary Candidate for Bury North

Local Lib Dem MP joins opposition to wording of Congestion Charge referendum question

October 21st, 2008 by richardbaum
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Liberal Democrat MP for Hazel Grove Andrew Stunell today met with Sir Neil McIntosh, Returning
Officer for the Greater Manchester Transport Referendum, to set out his opposition to the proposed question wording, published on Monday 20 October.

The meeting in Westminster came after a group of cross-party MPs led by Mr Stunell called at the weekend for a change to the question, which they believe is misleading in its present form.

Commenting Andrew said:

“The proposed question doesn’t mention the Congestion Charge at all, which will astonish most people. It must be made clear that there is a price to be paid by local residents for this plan, or the whole referendum is undermined. After all, if you ask people if they want a bar of chocolate, most people would say yes, but if you told them it would cost £10, most people would say no. The Congestion Charge issue is the key factor, and should be in the question.”

The row over the proposed question comes in the wake of a poll showing that 48% of residents across Greater Manchester did not know that public consultation on the Charge had taken place, with only 11% actually taking part.

Commenting further after the meeting, Andrew said:

The consultation process hasn’t reached its target, with half of all residents completely unaware of it. Now we’re being told that the referendum question itself will not make the direct link between the transport proposals and the congestion charge. I have urged Sir Neil to
think again before the final decision on the question is taken next week.”

It is good to see that cross-party opposition to the congestion charge proposals is now really getting moving. I have said all along that this is not a party political issue. It is simply a question of whether Manchester should play the guinea pig role whilst a deeply regressive and unfair tax is used to pay for transport we should already have.

Today the people of Liverpool began to benefit from a “tap and go” smart card bus ticketing system, which is a revolutionary innovation for the area, and will allow simple and convenient bus ticketing, a bit like London’s Oyster. This is just the type of innovation Manchester should already have, but we can’t get it without Congestion Charging. Nobody has yet told me a good reason why not, and whilst this question remains unanswered, I can’t see a good reason to vote for this congestion tax.

Rick

Prestwich Regeneration Plans Revealed

Tuesday, October 21st, 2008 by richardbaum

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Late last year Bury Council commissioned the consultants URBED and AGDR to draw up a vision, and strategy for the centre of Prestwich. This was after many years of campaigning by your local Prestwich Liberal Democrat Focus Team to get Bury to take our town centre seriously. Local people are now being asked to have our say on the proposals in the consultation period which is 13 October - 24 November 2008. Every household in Prestwich is being sent a consultation newsletter which includes a survey to send in your views. The newsletter is here, the full report is here.

The vision for Prestwich is that it becomes a sustainable “urban village” inlcuding:
- a community hub
- a lively high street
- a gateway to parkland
- a place to live
- a place to work

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You can visit the special consultation website at www.bury.gov.uk/prestwich regeneration or email your views to prestwichregeneration@bury.gov.uk. Please let us, your local Councillors what you think so we can best represent your views.

Avoiding a mid life crisis, avoiding a new life starting, and something about the Prestwich Plan

October 17th, 2008 by richardbaum
Comment?

Somewhere along the line it all went wrong, and so now I find myself looking forward to spending Friday night in the textiles section of IKEA. For the few uninitiated people left in the world, IKEA is the place where youth and freedom come to die atop a mountain of flat-packed furniture. Where once I lolled about innocently, surrounded by cuddly things and spending time lying on grass on summer evenings, now I stand confused with a screwdriver in one hand and a cartoon instruction manual in the other, trying to assemble furniture the various ill-fitting parts of which leave me shrieking in despair.

Tonight, thankfully, we are only going for curtains, so I can leave the screwdriver in its box. But the fact that it has become an event so important to our lives that we’ve spent most of the week looking forward to it is a distressing reminder that I have sleep-walked into the domestic doldrums, possibly never to return. One of these days I am going to have a mid life crisis so dramatic that it makes Michael Douglas in “Falling Down” seem like Bambi’s mum.

I have just spent some time preparing for the next meeting of the Prestwich Developing Communities Group, which I chair and which is a sub-group of the Local Area Partnership. I think the major role of the group is ensuring that the Prestwich Plan, which we developed earlier this year, is carried out and that all the promised improvements are implemented. The Plan has been around for a few months now, and it’s coming to the time when we have the first round of updates. I have come up with a list of people whose targets are ready to be updated, and now they’ll be contacted. I do hope that the promised progress is being made. This is the first time we’ve had such a hands-on approach to monitoring performance and improvement, so maybe the requests for updates and to appear at meetings might come as a surprise. But I think it’s important in managing the work of a complex partnership that we hope will deliver big improvements for Prestwich.

Over the weekend, assuming I escape IKEA intact, I am going to visit my ludicrously pregnant friend. She is now the size of a yacht, and I expect the arrival of a new little friend for us all at any moment. Apparently she’s not due for another three weeks, but the dimensions of human anatomy surely can’t allow for much more growth. I hope that whatever happens the birth doesn’t take place whilst I’m there. Aside from the health consequences, my life has enough note-worthy incidents in it without me accidentally witnessing a birth. And besides, I have plans for Sunday involving Café Rouge and a folk concert. I don’t want to be knee deep in damp towels and umbilical cords.

Rick

Strangled by a Vine

October 16th, 2008 by richardbaum
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I was asked to appear on the Jeremy Vine show on Radio 2 today to talk about the DVLA’s general ineptitude and ludicrous heavy-handedness in doling out fines to all and sundry. The radio folks had apparently seen my earlier rants on here about the £40 fine the DVLA mistakenly sent me. Somehow they had not managed to find anyone else equally apoplectic with rage at the DVLA’s idiocy, so settled on me.

Unfortunately I followed a guest whose dead son had been pursued by them, and who had had to resort to taking a jar of ashes to court to get them off her back. I couldn’t really top that with my story of sending them a politely worded letter until they left me alone, and so I limped my way through 90 seconds of awkwardness. It was quite clear that, following on from “ashes-gate,” the presenter and I were of one mind that it was probably time to drop the subject.

As well as my cameo as Mr Anti-climax, the experience was tarnished by a telephone line with an echo that made the whole thing sound like I was talking inside an empty cave. And I also forgot to mention anything I really wanted to mention, like the 1.2m fines sent out by the cretinous DVLA computer each year without a phone number to ring to appeal them; or the 500,000+ fines which aren’t paid, likely because a lot of them are sent in error; or the fact that only 3% of non-payers actually get taken to court.

Instead I was corralled into talking about silly things like whether it was right for “mild mannered” Liberal Democrats to get angry at the DVLA. The whole thing was an opportunity wasted, I fear. Plus, a complete mental blockage preventing me from remembering anything about how to do interviews. Ah well… At least I got to appreciate the amusing irony of hanging on the line whilst Radio 2 played Rod Stewart’s “Lady Jane” which includes the line “don’t leave me hanging on the line.” If I’d have known when listening to it that it would have been the high-point of the occasion, I’d have hung up.

My media-generated sadness was compounded today when I read in the Bury Times about next week’s Council meeting about Job Evaluation. They are terming it a “showdown,” which is absolutely fantastic save for the fact that I can’t go to it because I’m on holiday. I sit through more tedious Council meetings than all the sins in all my past lives could warrant, and yet when one comes along which would give me the opportunity to do something good for the staff, my party and the general populous, I’m away. It’s like last year when I bought a season ticket to watch utter trudge at Manchester City all year, only to miss the victory against United whilst cut off from the world on Mull.

Two days in London have not mellowed me.

Rick

Sign here at last!

October 13th, 2008 by richardbaum
1 Comment

At the very beginning of “Human Traces,” a novel by Sebastian Faulks, is a passage about a boy who causes a dead frog to leap about the room by applying electrodes to its brain. I didn’t think that I’d ever be able to apply that tale to my life, but recent efforts by the Council’s Environmental Services Department have shown me that I can make use of the dead-frog parable after all.

It’s remarkable that after many months of utter stasis on any number of local issues, the Department has, in the last few days, had some form of electrode attached to their nether regions. A frighteningly high voltage must be unceasingly passing through it, because recently the Department has jerked into life like Frankenstien’s Monster, and is going on a rampage of improvement works throughout the ward.

On top of the couple of successes from the other day, today there were two more. First off some overhanging trees on Bury New Road were cut back. That nobody walking along the pavement-cum-jugle-pathway had their eyeball punctured by an errant twig dangling about the place was more down to outrageous good fortune than anything else. But now the shoppers of Prestwich can walk down the road without risking a thorn to the skull, thanks to the good work of the Council, and within the timescales they set themselves when I asked them to do it.

More remarkable than that though, is that only five months after I asked for a replacement chevron sign at the end of Butterstile Lane, one was put there today! All shiny and new it is, a beacon of hope to any driver too engrossed in his text message / fiddly radio / attractive passenger to notice that there is a sharp bend in the road. And, in all fairness to Environmental Services, although they admit that there was a monumental cock-up which saw a four month delay in the first place, they have met their revised deadline on this occasion.

Which is all good news.

Unfortunately any semblance of jolliness was ripped from within me, and replaced by a black shadow enveloping my entire body and soul, when I discovered that the Council had shafted me by scheduling the emergency Council meeting on Job Evaluation for half term week when I am away. This horrific piece of diary abuse means that I will be reduced to either lambasting the Leader of the Council by speaker phone, or more likely entirely prevented from giving him the public rollicking he so richly deserves for his utter neglect of the feelings of staff.

I was very much looking forward to getting answers to questions, and allowing the staff of the Council to channel their anger through me and enjoy a collective cathartic release as I told the Leader exactly what they and I thought of him. Sadly this pleasure has now been denied me, although the staff will be pleased to hear that there are plenty of others forming a not-really-very-orderly queue to shout at the Leader on their behalf instead of me.

And on top of that, I have to get up at the crack of dawn tomorrow, as I’m going to a conference in London with work. I don’t know if there is a darker colour than black (well, I do, and there isn’t), but if such a colour were to exist, the thought of a 5.45am alarm call would have turned the existing black shadow just that shade.

But still, whilst this is bad news for me, it is good news for you, because I won’t be able to blog whilst there (the internet hasn’t reached those parts yet…) and so you will be safe for 48 hours. Rejoice.

Rick

Some success!

October 10th, 2008 by richardbaum
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After months of ceaselessly howling at the Council’s Environmental Services Department like some kind of feral dog that just won’t be put down, I scored a double success today. And there was a victory for common sense over housing too, which was the cherry on top of my Council cake.

Firstly, and most astoundingly, the Council finally agreed to implement the street cleaning rota sign that we’ve been harping on about for about the last year. After to-ing and fro-ing between officers and the Executive, and after quite a bit of me banging my head repeatedly against hard surfaces, out of nowhere the Council have agreed that from next week local people will be able to see exactly when the centre of Prestwich is cleaned.

This is great news for many reasons. It’s not just because the Environmental Services Department have at long last moved towards sanity on this issue, but also because local people will be able to see, for the very first time, just when the centre of town is cleaned. This will either put pay to the damaging rumours that we aren’t cleaned as often as we should be, or it will confirm them, and then we can shout a lot and get it put right. Either way, at least we’ll know.

The sign they’re going to use to keep people informed was actually designed by me, because it ws getting so ridiculous that the Council wouldn’t do it themselves that I had to do it for them. So from next week you will be able to see who cleaned Prestwich, when in the day it was done, and where to go with complaints. Thanks very much to the Council for agreeing to this.

Also today, a vehicle owner who had very considerably parked his gigantic advertising truck outside someone’s front room a month ago finally moved it, after your local Councillors stepped in yesterday. The Council paid a visit to the owner this morning, and when it was made clear to him that it wasn’t really on to leave a massive advert blocking someone’s entire windows, he shifted the truck. We don’t know where it’s gone, which is slightly worrying, but if it’s ended up outside your house instead, accept my apologies and please just get in touch.

And finally, there has been some progress with the sad case of the family with the baby living in damp conditions at Sherbourne Court. At first, Six Town Housing used their corpse-like reflexes to suggest a meeting in about three weeks. They have since reacted to my ongoing looks of anger by shaping themselves and actually popping round to see the sick child earlier than planned. This has now happened, and they’ve agreed a plan of action to improve the through-flow of air, and to replace some faulty equipment in the bathroom. In addition, another meeting has been arranged between the tenant and the Council regarding possible re-housing. So we’re getting somewhere there too. 

I needed a couple of good news stories today, after last night’s meeting of the Council’s Licensing and Safety Panel. For some reason, every meeting of the panel sees me descend into some kind of vortex into the recesses of the space-time continuum, as no matter how long or short the agenda, the meetings all manage to drag on ad infinitum until I almost forget why I’m there or who I am. Last night’s went on til gone 10, and in all seriousness I doubt the fairness of a process which sees panel of Councillors deciding on the livelihoods of taxi drivers when they’ve all been there for three hours solid, and some of them haven’t been home yet after a long day at work before the meeting. We should start earlier, split up, have more meetings, or preferably stick to doing what we do know but just say less words, speak quicker, and keep our veerings from the relevant at least marginally sane. Three hours into the meeting, and after the umpteenth question from a panel member who would have known the answer if he’d read his papers in advance, it really is a battle to see which will explode first - my rage or my bladder. This is a serious panel whose decisions have a real impact on real people - I don’t see that there’s an excuse to get so delayed on an agenda and to rush through some people’s cases because we’ve dithered on others.

I hope then, that the weekend is as pleasant and successful as today has been. I was supposed to be going away, but that has turned to dust like so many other of my exciting plans. And as a result I am left here with my leaflets and the faintly distressing prospect of having to watch England labour to an unconvincing victory against Kazakhstan in the football.

Ah well, at least the Licensing meeting isn’t still going on…

Rick

Nick Clegg message on the banking crisis - and Bury MBC money is safe

October 9th, 2008 by richardbaum
Comment?

Nick Clegg, the leader of the Liberal Democrats, has released a statement on the government’s moves to intervene in the banking crisis:

“When a ship is sinking, we must send out the lifeboats, not argue about who steered the ship into the iceberg. At Prime Minister’s Question Time yesterday, I pledged my support for the moves being taken by the Government. Vince Cable and I have been clear that we must do whatever is necessary to halt the downward spiral of the British economy.

But the Government must do more. It must use the leverage it currently has over banks to end unacceptable bonuses for senior executives, ensure that home repossessions are only ever an absolute last resort, and cut some slack for struggling small businesses before calling in their loans.

Now is also the time for tax loopholes to be closed for the very wealthy and the money saved to be used to cut taxes for low and middle income earners. Hard-pressed families and individuals need more of their own money back now more than ever as they are worrying about their savings and facing mounting bills.

We are fortunate to have a great deal of economic expertise in our party with Chris Huhne, David Laws and Susan Kramer working closely with myself and Vince Cable on the challenges that face us. Over the coming weeks and months it will continue to be our party that is leading the debate with the ideas and solutions to put Britain’s economy on the right track.”

On a related note, I was assured this morning that Bury MBC does not have any money in troubled Icelandic banks. This is good news, particularly after what happened with Bury’s money when BCCI collapsed a few years ago.

Rick

Job Evaluation - Leader says “No” to Scrutiny, so emergency Council meeting called

October 8th, 2008 by richardbaum
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Last week I wrote that the Leader of the Council had opted out of attending an Overview and Scrutiny panel on Job Evaluation / Equal Pay, in favour of going to a swanky dinner in Manchester. I was angry about this, but confident that at the very least the meeting could be rescheduled so that employees could get some reassurance over a process which could see many of them lose thousands in salary.

Today the Leader has once again left me feeling extremely angry and disappointed, failing to agree a date for the revised meeting, and again depriving staff of their right to a public explanation. I have been working with the Chair of the Scrutiny Commission to make sure that this meeting happens. I know that the Chair has been forthright in his requests to Council officers and the Leader that he make himself available. This has not happened, and now the opposition to the Bury Conservative Council have had to resort to drastic measures to get this heard in public.

A motion has been signed, calling for an extraordinary meeting of full Council on this issue. This means that the Leader will be forced to come to a public hearing and answer questions on this issue.

It is a crying shame that it has come to this. Whilst it is obviously vital to get effective scrutiny of the process, a meeting of full Council is only fractionally as effective as a Scrutiny Commission would have been. The environment is nowhere near as suited to proper questioning, and the confrontational layout of a chamber with opposing members facing each other is not conducive to information gathering like the inclusive environs of a Scrutiny Commission are.

That this issue needed forcing at all is a damning indictment of an absent Leader who has shown nothing but a lack of interest in responding to questions which need answering.

Maybe I’m naive about politics and how the Council works, but I just don’t understand how the Leader of an organisation that is, for whatever reason, shafting a quarter of its staff, can just disappear from view and seemingly go out of his way to block scrutiny of the process.

He does himself and the Council as a whole no favours at all by not being utterly open to questioning, and nothing but transparent in his desire to share information. It is not good for anyone that we in the opposition have to strain every sinew on behalf of the staff to get the Conservative ruling group to answer questions about this process.

This isn’t about bashing the Tories. We don’t want to question them to make them look silly or to apportion blame for the outcome, which was not entirely anyone’s fault. We want answers about the process the Tories implemented, and about how we can all make it better for the staff.

I am incredibly frustrated that the Conservative response is to bury their heads in the sand and not answer. It took weeks to get the answers I posted on here yesterday. Weeks of uncertainty for staff, weeks of frustration for Councillors, and weeks of feeble inaction by the Tories.

This issue is massive. It affects thousands of people, leaving them helpless at a time when the wider economy is making things worse. Our role is to help them, and we can’t because the Conservatives led by Cllr Bibby are making the job of helping so much more difficult. They should genuinely be ashamed of themselves.

We don’t want a party political fight, we just want open answers. The consistent, inexplicable delays just makes me shake my head with dejection. It’s crazy and it makes me wonder what the hell I’m doing with it all. What is the point of trying when every avenue is blocked?

I hoped very much that yesterday’s answers marked the start of some new openness from the Leadership and the officers carrying out their instructions. Today’s ongoing unwillingness by the Leader to submit to the most basic scrutiny has convinced me that it wasn’t, and now the opposition has had to invoke this drastic step of a full Council meeting to try and get the answers we should have had long ago.

Rick

Job Evaluation - some answers

October 7th, 2008 by richardbaum
Comment?

I have today received answers to a number of questions I have recently put to the Council regarding Job Evaluation and Equal Pay. I feel that it is important for staff and everyone involved to be as informed as possible, so here are the questions and answers received from the Council’s Director of Personnel today:

Question 1:
Is it true that appeals are taking place without Union representation, because Union officers are busy advising would-be appellants and do not have capacity to attend appeals that have been scheduled early in the process whilst still dealing with the preliminary stages of those for later on?

Answer 1:
In response to the further question concerning appeals, I met with the Branch Secretary and the Regional Officer from Unison this morning when we agreed the following with regard to the future conduct of appeals:

Unison will provide trained panel members so we can run 8 panels per day. During that first week Unison will “double up” and may sometimes provide two analysts to sit on the appeals panels, one will take part, the other will be an observer;
We will review the position when we meet on 23rd October.

Unison will provide the names of their analysts to Corporate HR; local stewards will be supported by regional officers to ensure that the 8 panel commitment can be maintained.

The co-ordination of appeals will be undertaken by Corporate HR working on the assumption that we will run 8 panels per day. Advance notice of the appellants details, paperwork, time and venue will be provided so that Unison have at least three working days and no more than seven working days notice to prepare for the hearings.

We agreed to review the process and progress of appeals in two weeks time (meeting with Unison on 23rd Oct)

For the remainder of this week we will cover appeals where TU analysts are available / have committed their time to participating in the appeal.

For information, some appeals have taken place this morning (supported by Unison) and others have taken place where the appellants requested that their appeal went ahead without a TU analyst.

Question 2:
How much money will it cost to extend full pay protection for employees of Bury MBC to the 2 years, 9 months level proposed by Bolton MBC

Answer 2:
If we were to offer full protection for 2 years, 9 months, the total cost to the Council would be £9.5m.

Please note we have sought permission to capitalise protection costs, however this option has been declined by the DCLG.

Question 3:
Please explain the different points-to-pay system which sees 430 points in Bury equate to £18,907 and 430 points in Bolton equate to £23,749

Answer 3:
The establishment of a pay to points system in each Authority is a matter for local determination that is influenced by local job market factors and affordability. All Local authorities must retain the nationally agreed pay spine (which Bury has done) but each Authority can determine the relationship between JE points and pay to suit its own local circumstances. For information please note that in the pay to points model developed by Blackburn with Darwen council, 430 points equates to a salary range of £17,800 - £20,100.

Question 4:
Please explain the low scoring for Revenues and Benefits staff in relation to the “Responsibility for Finance” section.

Answer 4:
Employees within Revenues and Benefits were awarded points within the levels 1-4 against this factor (there are six levels in total).

The factor measures the direct responsibility of the jobholder for financial resources, including cash, vouchers, cheques, debits and credits, invoices, budgets and income.

It takes into account the nature of the responsibility, eg. correctness and accuracy, safekeeping, confidentiality and security, deployment and degree of direct control etc.

This factor is hierarchical for jobs in finance and the guidance states that the levels awarded to jobs should reflect this. Consequently managerial roles within the R&B service were awarded Level 4 which is defined as:

The job involves high direct responsibility for financial resources. The work involves either:

(a) accounting for very large sums of money, in the form of cash, cheques, direct debits, invoices, or equivalent, where care, accuracy & security are important or:

(b) being accountable for large expenditures from an agreed budget or equivalent income. The responsibility may include contributing to the setting and monitoring of the relevant budget and ensuring effective spend of budgeted sums.

Other posts in the hierarchy were graded accordingly.

Question 5:
How many roles had their points cut during moderation, and what was the average number of points lost?

To be advised.

Question 6:
Can you confirm that, for all part time staff, gains and losses have been pro-rata’d as appropriate?

Answer 6:
Yes, part time equivalent figures have been used in the calculation

Question 7:
Has consideration been given to the “Stafford” model of dealing with this issue?

Answer7:
Contact has been made with Staffordshire to establish the facts. Staffordshire did not abandon Single Status. They are in the advanced stages of implementing the results from their Pay and Grading Review. In broad terms, some £85m has been pumped in to support the review’s outcome. This has, of course, significantly reduced the number of losers.

I continually receive questions from staff and residents on this, which I am relaying to the Leader for answers. These are the answers I received today, and I am hopeful that the outstanding question, and any others I receive, will be answered shortly.

Rick

Housing progress, sleeping sickness

October 7th, 2008 by richardbaum
Comment?

Some success this morning in the struggle with Six Town Housing over the condition of the flat at Sherbourne Court. It is home to a baby (and will soon be home to another), but is riddled with damp which is obviously doing nobody any good.

After some increasingly fraught lobbying yesterday, we have managed to get the maintenance visit which was compassionately scheduled for three weeks from now brought forward to tomorrow. That will allow for repairs to be scheduled, which I have asked to be actually carried out urgently.

Unfortunately the morning has not been entirely successful. I am becoming increasingly tired because of Tamsin’s futuristic alarm clock, which is driving me mad and is so hyper-effective that it wakes me up a full half hour before it’s supposed to each and every day.

It is a Philips “Wake-up Light,” ostensibly designed to wake people up slowly and as nature intended, rather than startle them into consciousness by playing the news intro from Five Live, which is what traditionally woke me up. The advertising blurb talks about people with conditions which make them actually depressed about getting up on dark mornings. Tam seems well up for believing this, and whilst I am sure that there are awful and genuine mental illnesses of this sort, I am struggling to overcome the suspicion that she might just, y’know, not like getting up for work.

So this thing of her’s is a radio alarm clock with a gigantic light on top of it, which slowly comes to life for half an hour before the scheduled alarm call, reaching full brightness at wake-up time rather like the sun rising. And then, at the allotted hour, rather than the radio or some beeping puncturing the air, the sleeper can be stroked gently towards awakenness by the sounds of water rolling over rocks, or birds tweeting in the trees, or, oddly, frogs croaking. Tamsin likes the birds.

Apparently Tam likes this new method. Unfortunately I think I have the world’s most sensitive eyes, because the very instant the light begins its grim march towards full shininess, I wake up. And then I spend the next half an hour staring at the ceiling watching it get brighter and brighter, like a passenger staring out the window on a space ship to the Sun.

For her, this alarm clock does exactly what it says on the box. She langurously stretches out at 7am with a smile on her face. I look bitter and annoyed, and would much prefer to revert to the traditional method which saw me flailing about like a madman as the news headlines blare from the wall, wondering whether I am still in my hideious nightmare or whether the FTSE losing 2000 points in one morning is actually true.

What makes the situation worse is that I bought the damn thing, as a birthday present. And it cost the best part of £100! One hundred pounds to be woken up for work in the most irritating way possible.

She’s bounding round the house like a song bird, fresh as a daisy, whilst I am half an hour more tired than I was before, becoming insane with hatred for the little orange glow in the corner of the room. I have tried wearing a mask to shield my eyes, but frankly it makes me look like a buffoon. And I think I have an odd-shaped face because it won’t sit right on it.

There is no escape from this. Even now I can feel it burning its fake sunshine into my eyes. I can’t bring myself to deprive her of her morning crux, but how’s a man supposed to get a good night’s sleep when the sun itself rises in his bedroom? Answers on a postcard please.

Rick

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